Who are you fooling?

I got to know about the imposter syndrome through this post. And the only reason the first lines hit me so much is because I think I fool everyone into believing that I’m much smarter than I am.

Maybe it’s a good thing that I don’t consider myself very good at my job – so I’m constantly trying to improve. But at the same time I may be getting into the cycle of looking for gigs that are below my potential. It gives me a secure feeling. I liked the line that meant a project is not worth taking if it does not scare you shitless – but being scared all the time is not a good feeling either.

I'm in a good place right now - mostly because I'm overlooking a lot of projects. So I don't get the time to fuss about these things and I oversee people who have lesser experience and logic.

But does that mean I'm not fooling anyone?

Books

I read – therefore… well I read. I’ve realized that I read more and more these days. I’ve always been the one to read up about latest trends in the world of the intertubes. Procrastination – I think not – more like a passion to collect information that enhances future problem solving capability. I use this information to do things that lead others to say – “why doesn’t everybody use/do this?” It’s only because they don’t know.
I’ve always done most of my reading on the pc. Why? Lots of reasons –

1. My office was a 15 min walk away from home.
2. Had an awesome unlimited internet connection.
3. I spent most of my time in front on the pc – I’d stopped watching television since everything could be downloaded.
4. Even though it would drain my time away – I liked reading online.

I always used to think of myself as an internet gopher – well turns out I just like to read.
This started when I made a new best friend – someone who had a repository of books I could access. I’ve been reading throughout this year but I’ve been reading regularly since August ’09.
I don’t especially like sleeping in the train ride to my new work place so I prefer to read. It makes me feel productive too.

Stuff read - (Since August)

• Life of Pi
• Super Freakonomics
• My friend Sancho (which I feel the need to mention had almost no reference to aforementioned Sancho)
• Two States
• Against All Odds
• Jurassic Park
• Bourne Identity
• A Fine Balance (which I’m currently reading)

 Drop me a comment if you have any suggestions for books that I must read.